My Wish

"My wish, for you,
Is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold"
                                                 - My Wish by Rascal Flatts

I searched for ages trying to find a song that reflected my personal impression of the lovely Stephanie Sprott. My immediate thought was to find a song from a 90's boy band because that seems to be her desired choice of listening music. But I couldn't find one that dealt with the message I wanted to get across. In order to represent how I feel about Steph, I wanted to find a song that resembled a kind of powerful sense of inspiration. I see Steph as someone who works extremely hard for what she wants. I was looking for a song that took the standpoint of praising someone's initiative in defining their own future by maintaining a clear vision of what they want in life. But the only ones I could find were mostly by the way of feminist or religious perspectives and I didn't want this post to lead in either of those directions. This one, by Rascal Flatts, isn't exactly the kind of song I had been looking for but it comes from a different angle and I think it works perfectly in what I want to say.

I know Steph doesn't really like country music in general, but she has a few tolerable bands and I am pretty sure Rascal Flatts is one of them. So here it is Steph! My post for you, to you, and all about you!

Firstly, let me give a little insight as to why I see what I see in Steph. I met her in first year university when I asked her to curl my hair for the frosh week formal and we became besties right away. After the fun and games of first year, we moved into a house together with 3 other girls (including the aforementioned Cat). Needless to say, as housemates, we had our ups and downs just like anyone else does with a person they live with. But if I am being completely honest here, as Steph and I lived together for those three years we stayed great friends, but we weren't able to really keep that same close bond that we had built up in first year. Looking back on it now I have a theory as to why our relationship has developed the way it has:

Different Priorities.

You see, Steph and I get along great because, on a personality level, we have a lot in common. We are both silly and outrageous at times but also have the reliable capacity to be serious and determined when necessary. But the point at which we differ is our direction in life - hers being well in full motion and mine, well, lacking any direction at all. Steph always had her priorities lined up perfectly. When it was time to buckle down in university, Steph did just that, and she has so much to show for it now. When it was summertime and she needed to make money for next year's tuition, she worked her butt off. While we were in school, she always had her mind set on a goal; she worked hard to structure her life in a certain way so she could work all summer to pay for school so she could spend the school year concentrating on getting the grades to maintain her scholarship. She had it all figured out - with a solid vision of her successful future. I don't think I ever really got that, until now. I was always slagging her for spending too much time on homework and caring too much about marks. But now I understand the importance behind her solid work ethic and her pristine grade average. She is kicking butt doing her Master's right now! She has always had this idea of the life that she wants for herself and kudos to her for being well on her way there. I have never had such a clear vision for my own life, and I regret trying to find fault in her chosen lifestyle. I know now that we were just two different types of university students, and that is clearly reflected in the way our past decisions have lead us to our present lives.


So, I bet you've been wondering when I was going to finally bring the song into the post! Well, like it says in the chorus of the song that I wrote up on the top of the post, my wish for Steph is that her life becomes all that she wants it to. She has always had high hopes for where she wants to be in life and I hope she never loses sight of those. I hope she stays her youthful and fun-loving self all the while. I hope that all the hard work that she puts into making a life for herself pays off in a really big way someday. I know that it will, because Steph knows how to manage her life with a positive outlook.

"And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile, "

Like I said before, Steph always had her priorities straight, so I don't have to reiterate the idea behind this verse in the song because I know that she abides by it anyway.

"if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you"

This verse also speaks to what I want to mention as my final and foremost point.  I don't want to leave out the fact that aside from her determined focus on a successful future, Steph has an unwavering dedication to her friendships. She is the kind of friend who is never afraid to show affection and speak up about how she feels about her friends. She knows what being a good friend means when it comes to dependency and loyalty. Steph is the kind of friend that I know, no matter what we go through together (ie: near death experiences) she will always be there to listen, give advice, or just blow off steam with. I think it says a lot that even though I live on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean I still talk to Steph virtually everyday. Like I said, our friendship has had its ups and downs, but we're in it for the long haul Sprott!

And don't forget...

"And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish."

All or Nothing (Live Your Dreams)

"Live your dreams
It's not as hard as it may seem
You gotta work to get the cream
On your hopes you must lean
From your fears
You have to wean yourself
It's all or nothing,
Give your everything."

- All or Nothing (Live Your Dreams) - Athena Cage


This song is mostly known for its appearance in the movie "Save the Last Dance" but I kindly ask all of you to temporarily put aside those images of Julia Stiles dancing triumphantly around a chair and picture one of my favourite people in the world - Miss Catherine Veitch.
Yup - this one's for you Fringe!

This song came to mind right away when I thought about which song to pick for Cat's post. It really represents the inspiring way in which I witness her conducting her life. I know when she reads this she is going to go all humble and do that whole "pfft, you don't know the half of it" look she gives, but seriously, we could all learn a lot from this woman - I know I did.

You see, like this song encourages, Cat truly believes in living your dreams. And she tends to give her everything in all that she does. The evidence of this goes back before I even met her. When she was just a teenager she decided to move to the big city and rent an apartment on her own in order to go to a performing arts high school to pursue her dream in music theatre.

(And ask anyone who has heard her perform! Wheewee! That girl can sing!) That giant leap alone shows you that even from a young age she knew not to let anything get in the way of her hopes and dreams.
Another example of her inspirational tendencies is when she decided to finish university after her third year, instead of doing an Honours degree, which is what everyone around her was doing. I, myself, did the Honours degree because it just seemed like the right thing to do because everyone else was doing it. I am probably not going to need that extra university year for any reason in the future. But I didn't realize that at the time, I was kind of just going with the flow ya know? Well, Cat here, she isn't a go-with-the-flow kinda gal. She is more like a make-your-own-way kinda woman. I truly admire her for that. So she graduated university with a general degree and went back to the big city to pursue her newly-found dream to become a make-up artist.
And now she is a make-up artist.

(You can see her work in an online magazine called "Off The Map" as well as on her website!

These are just two insights into the life of Cat Veitch that allude to her vital need to be where she wants to be. She reminds me of a quotation that one of my favourite professors said once (actually I might have already mentioned this saying in an earlier post) "Wherever you are, you should know why you're there." Cat lives and breathes this mantra. It is one philosophy that - if you haven't noticed yet - I like to talk about a lot but find difficult to portray in my everyday life. It is at those times of difficulty that I wish that I had Cat's (for lake of a better word) balls.

Just like the song insists, Cat is constantly learning to wean herself off her fears. She has a way of transforming her fears into strength. Kind of like that part in Harry Potter where they learn how to turn their worst fears into something they can laugh at... well actually not really like that, but I think Cat would like that reference haha. Okay, so it's like she knows herself well enough that she is aware of her capabilities, therefore getting over fears is just another challenge that she is willing to accept. (Challenge Accepted! haha)

The most recent fearless life act that Fringe completed without a glitch was her two week trip to Europe last month. It doesn't sound as life-altering as the others that I have mentioned, but it really did mean a lot; not only to her, but to me as well. To my great pleasure, part of her trip was to visit me in Edinburgh and we shared some great times, including fabulous talks. I am so happy she decided to come see me.
Cat has always loved the idea of living in the UK, more specifically, London, and to me, I think this recent trip was a little test drive. I saw it as her dipping her toes in the water before deciding to jump in. And I know she'll jump in someday soon. History has shown that if Cat wants to do, Cat will find a way. In this sense, I think this trip really was life-changing. Because she was able to witness first-hand what life would be like in London. And my guess is that that was just the little dosh of excitement she needed to make her wanting more.

This verse of the song really defines the kind of person I see in Cat,

"You are what you believe
You got to bring the heat
Set the pace, competition take the lead
This is it, all eyes on you
So stay on point and prove
That you deserve what's long overdue"

With such strong conviction invested in her hopes and dreams it is evident that Cat possesses a kind of confidence in herself needed in order to believe that everything will work out fine. She is who she believes she is because she can do what she believes she can do, and vice-versa. This entire verse speaks to the kind of confidence needed in order to live your dreams. And I tell ya, Cat has just the right amount of that to keep her going. As an aspiring music theatre star, she doesn't mind when all eyes are on her. And although she would never admit it now, I think that when she finally does became some hot shot in whatever career she ends up in, she will take the lead in the competition and take pride in proving to all of us just how much she deserves to be in that spotlight. There is no way that this girl could ever not deserve success because when she sets her heart out to do something she works her butt off to make sure she deserves it. All who know her would wholeheartedly agree that she deserves exactly what she wants. Fighting for what she deserves doesn't just apply to life choices and accomplishing dreams. She gives it her all in every goal she sets herself to achieve. Whether it be as important as getting involved in something she feels strongly about or as trivial as baking a batch of cupcakes (see, we know you tried!). But all joking aside, her devotedness also applies for being a respectable person and an unbelievable friend. Cat's the kind of friend who listens and doesn't judge. She is the kind of friend who will lend you a helping hand in anyway she can. Cat would never, ever tell you a lie because she believes in honesty. I respect that so much! Just like she fights for what she wants in life, she will fight for her friends.

Cat, I know you already knows this, but it's the last verse of the song and it would be a shame to leave it out.

"You know you gotta live your dreams
So don't you be afraid
Just set the pace, and take the lead
It's your time to shine"

No matter where you find yourself next year or ten or twenty years from now, you can look back and know that each and every decision you have made and every direction you have set out on in your life has and always will be a glimpse of you living your dreams. Just keep on livin' them baby! It's always your time to shine!

Whipping Post

Before I begin my post today I would like to inform you all that I have planned something spectacular! Due to the overwhelming fact that my total page views is almost at 1,000, I would be delighted to say thank you in a very special way! So, to show my gratitude, here is my idea, and I hope it goes as planned. I would like to honour my readers by dedicating one entire post to a selected 5 people each. Each post will be structured the same as all the rest in that it will center around song lyrics. I will choose a song that best fits the story behind our friendship and how I feel about our relationship. This is how it will work: when you open my page to read a post, look at the middle, right-hand side of the site and check what the total page views number is at. If you are anywhere from the one thousandth viewer to the one thousand and fifth viewer then I encourage you to write a comment on the most recent post saying that you are one of the lucky winners and you would like a post dedicated to you! Obviously, if you see that you are one of these viewers and you don't want me to write about you then that is completely fine. Just leave it be and everyone else who logs in after 1,005 can check to make sure there are, in fact, 5 people vying for a spot. If you see there are not yet 5 and you want a post then be sure to write a comment! I know this is kind of silly but I think it will be fun!

Okay, to today's post...

"I've been run down
I've been lied to
And I don't know why
I let that mean woman make me a fool
She took all my money"
                            - Whipping Post by The Allman Brothers

Who doesn't love The Allman Brothers, right? This song is especially a classic.

In the case of my post today, the "woman" that is being mentioned is the cheap flight booking company called lastminute.com. Or as it says on their website, they are "the UK’s leading online travel & leisure retailer".

Well, I am very angry with lastminute.com because they took my money and now it's been held hostage from me for 4 days!

The reason why I chose this song today is because I feel as though it relays the feelings I have about what I am going through right now. Metaphorically speaking, I feel like I am being punished day after day for making the stupid mistake of trying to book a flight with a company that doesn't even have the authority to take bookings, but still takes your money anyway!


Let me start at the beginning.

For the past two weeks or so I have been looking for a cheap flight ticket for my short visit home in May. I searched every cheap ticket search engine possible and saw that many times an inexpensive flight would pop up and then the next day would be significantly more.  This made me anxious about buying a ticket so when I got paid this past Friday I jumped on the chance of purchasing a flight ticket before the prices could go up any higher. I found this website called lastminute.com that had an Air Transat return flight that was a good price so I went through the motions and bought it.
Or so I thought, until I realized I didn't receive a confirmation e-mail but noticed that the money had been taken out of my account. So I called the company and they said it takes up to two hours for them to wait for the actual airline to confirm the flight price details and availability. This is when I realized I had made a mistake. I didn't realize I was working with a middle man!
I waited two hours and nothing happened. So I called again.
This time they informed me that the booking, in fact, did not go through and I wouldn't be able to get my money back for twenty-four to forty-eight hours.
So, I can't book a flight until I get my money back and I can't get my money back probably until Monday!
At this point I wished I was the kind of person who was okay with yelling at strangers on the phone.

It is now Monday.

I still don't have my money.

I made several phone calls to both the bank and the company and basically one is telling me that they have authorized the payment to be put back into my account and the other is saying they have authorized the money to be sent back. So what's the freakin' hold up!?

Needless to say, I am extremely infuriated with the entire situation, as well as with myself for not realizing that this company wasn't able to give me my flight when I gave them my money.

"Tied to the whippin' post
Tied to the whippin' post
Good Lord I feel like I'm dyin'"

I don't get mad very often so I am really struggling with trying to keep a good frame of mind. I am just afraid I will end up having to pay way more than I would like to.
I have today and tomorrow off and I was kind of looking forward to going out for runs and maybe walking up a hill or two. But instead I have basically set up camp in my bed, on my computer, hitting the refresh button on my online banking page every ten minutes, waiting. Waiting, waiting, waiting for my money to come back to me. I am not going to do anything or go anywhere until my money is back and my new flight is paid for. I don't care if that makes me pathetic. I will not feel any motivation to do anything until this is over with.

The bank said it should be in my account by tomorrow. It better be! If not, someone is going to get hurt!

New Shoes

"Hey, I put some new shoes on,
And suddenly everything is right,
I said, hey, I put some new shoes on and everybody's smiling,
It so inviting"
                    - New Shoes by Paolo Nutini

As you might have been able to tell in my last post, in the past couple of weeks I have been feeling in a bit of a rut. So in order to boost my morale I decided to take on the fun task of being more active and healthy! One component of this new health kick is going to involve going for runs at least 3 times a week! But I had no running shoes, so yesterday I went out and bought some proper running shoes. I don't really have the money for them but I decided they were an important investment. I went into a running shop and had my feet measured in every way possible (first time doing that - and long overdue I think). Subsequently, I purchased a pair of running shoes that are a perfect fit for my feet.

This song is a great depiction of what these new shoes represent for my life right now.

"Oh, short on money,
But long on time,
Slowly strolling in the sweet sunshine,
And I'm running late,
And I dont need an excuse,
'cause I'm wearing my brand new shoes"

I used my new shoes for the first time today and went for a walk up Blackford Hill with Mox. It was insanely windy but we went anyway. The view was gorgeous from the top! It's so great to be able to climb different hills and see the city and surrounding landscape from various angles. Next, I am going to tackle Calton Hill!

*sidenote*
These new shoes also came into my life at a great time. Coincidentally, Lent starts tomorrow so I'll have another incentive to stick to my running and staying healthy regime. 

I was just so happy with my new shoes today. They seem to be so much more than just shoes to me. They inspire a much-needed boost in my life; a reason to get out and enjoy my time here in Edinburgh. Today, after descending from Blackford Hill, Mox and I just walked around the streets south of the area where I live - somewhere we had yet to venture to. It's crazy how much I am loving this town. It's getting up there along with Kingston! We found great little shops and cafes and it reminded me that I don't have to have money to enjoy living here. I am quite content in just taking a day to explore the streets and window shop. There is so much of this beautiful city that I am so excited to see!

"Take me wandering through these streets,
Where bright lights and angels meet,
Stone to stone they take me on,
I'm walking to the break of dawn"

I'm strappin' on my new shoes and feeling good about my new goals. I'm going to stomp all over that voice in my head that's telling me I'm accomplishing nothing here. I am going to be active, be healthy, and see as much of my new home as possible!

"Hello new shoes, bye bye them blues"




(I am not posting any pictures from my trip up Blackford Hill because the weather wasn't so great, so I'll just have to go up another day when it's sunny to get better pictures)

Crystal Ball

"I'm learning to be brave in my beautiful mistakes."
                                                             -Crystal Ball by Pink

If you click on the song title and artist it will take you to a YouTube clip of Pink singing this song live. I have decided that from now on I will include a YouTube link for every song that I use from my blog posts. I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier! I love every song that I choose and sometimes I'll use one that isn't really well known so this way, if you're interested, you can have a listen. I am hoping that by doing this I might inspire some new listening choices in people, or at least give everyone a chance to acquire a better understanding of the meaning of each song by hearing it for themselves. I have gone back and included such a link for every post I have written thus far so if there was any song that you hadn't heard and wanted to hear, now's your chance!

So, moving on to my actual post for today...

First of all, I love Pink's music. Her lyrics are always so insightful and perfectly put. Even though some of her songs seem malicious and catty, each and every one of them has a clear message. I personally enjoy her softer songs better, such as the one I chose for this post.

As you can gather from the title, this song is dealing with the subject of the future.

"Fortune teller that says maybe you will go to hell.
But I'm not scared at all...
The cracks in the crystal, the cracks in the crystal ball."

I just love this idea of 'cracks in the crystal ball'. To me, these cracks are the decisions - made and unmade, both in the past and to come - that are to be blamed for our inability to see what is to become of our lives. I've been thinking a lot about this kind of stuff lately for a couple reasons, mainly stemming from a psychic reading I had done for me three years ago on my birthday. I know, to some this is going to sound silly and don't think that I completely believe in this sort of stuff, but hear me out. The psychic has been on my brain lately because I have been thinking a lot about my future career.

As I mentioned in my last post, I went to St. Andrew's awhile back. While I was there I met a guy around my age who I got to talking to about my writing because he shares the same interest. He informed me that he has a friend in Edinburgh who just started a company that was involved in publishing children's literature. I was extremely excited to hear this since I am very keen on becoming a children's book author.

*side note*
In elementary school, when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up I always answered "author". I was known for my poetry in school: being asked to recite my poems over the PA system, painting poems on the bulletin boards in the school's hallway, and winning a young authors award in grade two. I even had a poem published in a book when I was 13. Needless to say I was very passionate about writing. Then I went to high school, then university, and that dream kind of got away from me. I still wrote here and there but not as avidly as when I was younger or with the same vision of becoming a future famous writer anymore. Now I am back feeling as driven as I did when I was so young. I just find that so fascinating! And it gives me even more drive to think that maybe I really am meant to be a writer. There is something to be said about still wanting the same career close to 20 years later.

Okay, back to my story. So this guy told me he would send me the information about his friend's company, which he did and I have contacted them. I am still waiting for a reply. Now, what does this have to do with my psychic reading three years ago you ask? Well, she said that I would build a career for myself, in a unique way, combining the functions of communications and creativity in three years. Interesting? Indeed!

But, as Pink says, there are still cracks in the crystal ball.
And just as she says also, I'm not scared at all.
Like the words of this song allude to, I am not sure of my future and I don't believe that that psychic could see exactly what was in store for me, but at the same time I am not scared. I know that I am fully capable of carrying out my life in such a way that it will bring an outcome that I eventually will be pleased with. I think. 

Anyways, another line in her song reflects something else that's going on in my brain:

"Oh, I've had my chances and I've taken them all.
Just to end up right back here on the floor."


This kind of sounds depressing, but it really hits home in regards to the feelings that I have about my present situation. I am here, in Scotland, living the dream right? But for some reason I feel like I am accomplishing nothing besides doing the same thing I was doing in Kingston - just in a different city. I think this is a case of me listening to that little pesky voice in my head that is telling me I am wasting my time. You know, the whole theory that You are your biggest critic? But there's another, angelic, calming voice in my head too. It's telling me that I am in freakin' Scotland! And I am experiencing a new culture, and meeting new friends, and learning new things, and living! So, although the other voice rears its ugly head every once in a while, I'm choosing to listen to the second voice. It's nicer.

And after all this maybe I'll be saying....

"Oh I've felt that fire and I've been burned
But I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned
I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned."

and I'm not scared at all.

Living in Fast Forward

"I’ve been livin' in fast forward
Hillbilly rockstar out of control
I’ve been livin' in fast forward
Now I need to rewind real slow."
                              - Living in Fast Forward by Kenny Chesney

Okay, I don't know about the "hillbilly rockstar" part, but in general I totally understand where my pal Kenny is coming from in this song.

I haven't written a blog post in a month!! Where the heck did February go? I seriously feel like February went in fast-forward. Hence my song choice for this post!

So, I am going to go ahead and give a brief synopsis of what has happened in the past month.

Me and My Birthday Cake!

First and foremost my birthday was at the beginning of this month! February 3rd. It was a fabulous celebration, I must say. My friends from home, "the Erin's" (as they have become known as here) cooked me a delicious dinner while I baked my own cake (of course). Then we went to Cloisters to meet up with my new friend Nikki and her boyfriend. Then we went to my previous place of employment, Footlights for a quick drink before heading to a live music bar called Jazz Bar to see Nikki's friends' band called The Last of Barrett's Privateers. They were amazing! I enjoyed their music a lot! They sound like a mix between Mumford & Sons and Fleet Foxes. All-in-all it was a perfect evening of friends and music!

View from Arthur's Seat!

A couple days later my friend Cat came for a visit for a few days and I took her around to lots of places in Edinburgh... including this freaky paranormal ghost tour of the underground vaults under the city! It was sooo scary but awesome!
Then Samantha came the day before Cat left so we went for a walk up to Arthur's Seat (climb numero dos!) and saw the beautiful view of the city from high, high up! The mixture of the bright sun (which is incredibly rare here) and the fog settling over the city made for great photographs!
Then Cat left :(. But I still had Samantha here for the next two weeks and we did SOO much! We went bowling with some co-workers from Cloisters for the cook's birthday! It was really fun!! I friggen love bowling!

Me and Sam at Loch Lubnaig in the Highlands

Then we went on a guided bus tour of the Highlands. We got to see beautiful snow covered mountains and LOCH NESS!! No sightings of the monster, Nessy, though. Maybe next time. That was a great tour... got to see some beautiful landscape of northern Scotland.

Beautiful Highland Mountain

THEN we went for a day trip to London! Absolute Craziness! To put this into perspective: going on a day trip to London from Edinburgh is like going to New York City from Kingston for a day! I know right? Insanity. But we did it! We got up at 4 am to be at the airport for 6 am then took an hour and a half flight to London then spent the entire day doing lots of great touristy things... the London Eye, Westminster Abbey, Big Ben, Tower of London, The Beatles Shop, Sherlock Holmes Museum, and then (the main reason why we went to London) we went to a concert! It was one of my favourite singers, Sara Bareilles, opening for one of Sam's favourite bands, Maroon 5. It was sooo glorious! Such a great concert! But we had to leave early to catch the 9 HOUR bus ride back to Edinburgh which left at 11:15 pm and arrived in Edinburgh at 8:20 am. Needless to say.. it was a long day trip... lasting 29.5 hours to be exact!

Me and Sam at the London Tower

Castle Ruins in St. Andrews

Then we went on a day trip to St. Andrews which is a beautiful little Scottish town that is famous for all it's golf courses. We walked along the beautiful beach there and saw some beautiful buildings - including a castle of course. We also took a bus to a small fishing town called Anstruther where we ate fish and chips at the famous fish bar there. Apparently celebrities have gone there for their fish and chips, like Tom Hanks! Then back in St. Andrews we went to a pub and caught a traditional Scottish folk music session with all types of great musicians with various instruments.
For the rest of the time that Samantha was here, I had to work a lot so she had to so a lot of wondering around while I was at work but that suited her just fine in this beautiful city. We were able to enjoy a few nights out before she headed back to Canada - including going on the paranormal underground ghost tour (again, for me)! It's so cool!
And since she left on the 25th, I have been working A LOT! 6 days a week! But it's good because I am saving to buy a plane ticket for my visit home at the end of May for the arrival of a new nephew!

Me and My Fish and Chips

But I am definitely feeling the words of Kenny right now:

"I’m always runnin’, son-of-a-gunnin’
I’ve had a good time, it’s true
But the way I been goin’
It’s time that I tone it down just a notch or two"

I am going to continue working lots of shifts but I am definitely looking forward to taking it easy in-between. Cherish my days off.
Since this month has gone by so fast I am scared my time in Scotland is going to fly by!
So from now on I am vowing to myself to slow down and smell the roses.. or however that saying goes.

So long Fast-Foward February! Hello Mozy-On March!



Oh P.S: I am completely happy with my choice to quite Footlights and stay at Cloisters full-time. I love working at Cloisters more and more just as I love living in Edinburgh more and more!